


First Loves Are Sometimes Last Loves

by FriendlessAnimeLover



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Bottom Keith (Voltron), Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, Light Angst, M/M, Top Lance (Voltron)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-12
Updated: 2019-07-12
Packaged: 2020-06-26 18:52:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19774285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FriendlessAnimeLover/pseuds/FriendlessAnimeLover
Summary: It's been a few years since Allura's death. Keith and Lance finally hook up, but Keith vanishes the next day, completely cutting Lance off. Lance has no clue why he left, or what it is he wants from Keith. After talking with Pidge, Lance goes to confront Keith, not willing to lose someone he cares for all over again.





	First Loves Are Sometimes Last Loves

“Oh...fuck!”

Keith let out a strangled cry as Lance entered him. His body was on fire, everywhere Lance touched tingled. It hurt, gods it hurt, but not in a way that it was unpleasant. 

“You ok?” 

Keith’s eyes met Lance’s and a small smile curved his lips. Lance dipped his head and captured Keith’s lips with his own, as he gently began to move. A small burn built inside of Keith, as well as a dull ache. More, he wanted more. But, Lance didn’t increase his pace, and Keith’s annoyance only grew. He slammed his hands against Lance’s chest. 

“More,” he demanded, grinding his hips, bringing Lance even deeper in. 

“It’s your first time,” Lance breathed, “We shouldn’t overdo...Shit!”

Keith grabbed Lance by his shoulders, and rolled them over so that Lance was on his back, and Keith was straddling him. “More.” He began to ride Lance, increasing his pace with each thrust. Lance’s hands settled on his hips as he let Keith do as he pleased. 

Keith arched his back as he came, biting back his voice as he did. He collapsed on top of Lance, breathing heavily. It was only after a few moments passed, that he realized that Lance was still rock hard, and hadn’t come. Before he could do or say anything, Lance’s voice cut through his haze.

“You done?” He asked. Keith looked up at him. “My turn,” he grinned. 

He slowly pulled out of Keith, before flipping him over on his knees. Keith barely had a moment to process what was going on, before Lance drove into him once more. Keith let out a strangled gasp as Lance mercilessly slammed into him. 

“Oh, oh fuck!” Keith screamed, as waves of pleasure rolled through him. Lance’s arms wove around his waist, skin on skin, and he could feel Lance’s heartbeat as if it were his own. 

“Keith, Keith,” Lance murmured, his voice resonating through Keith’s ear, sending goosebumps running up and down his spine. Lance nibbled on his ear as he began to increase his thrusts. Keith was close to cumming again, and from the sudden acceleration, he knew Lance was too. Keith’s voice spilled from his lips, as Lance came inside of him. Keith’s own body shuddered from his own orgasm, and his fingers dug into the sheets. For a minute or two, neither of them spoke, just stayed like that, Lance didn’t even pull out. 

“Shit,” Lance breathed, finally breaking the silence. He pulled himself out, and they both collapsed onto the bed, still trying to catch their breath. Keith looked over at Lance, who had his eyes shut as he recovered. There was a pang in his chest as he realized that this was the first and last time Lance would ever hold him. That was the bargain they’d made when Keith first kissed Lance against the alley wall. 

It had been two years since Lance lost Allura, and it’d been even longer since Keith started noticing him that way. To be honest, Keith had no idea why he cared for Lance. The man was loud, annoying, stupid, etc. They’d gotten into so many squabbles over their years of knowing each other, yet somehow Keith had fallen for him. 

But, despite the fact he thought he saw signs that Lance felt the same way, saw him in the same light he saw Lance, his heart had been thoroughly trampled upon when Allura finally agreed to go on a date with Lance. Lance who’d been hitting on her since he first met her, had finally won her over, and Keith was left to watch as the man he loved embraced someone else. 

As far as Keith knew, Lance hadn’t taken another lover since Allura’s passing. He still mourned the Atleanean princess as if her death had happened yesterday and Keith knew it was selfish of him to monopolize Lance like this. Lance wasn’t his, he would never be his, and it was time for him to accept that. He gently skimmed his fingers over Lance’s facing, realizing that Lance had fallen asleep.

He quietly peeled himself off the bed, and grabbed his pants. His hotel wasn’t too far from here, he would shower when he got there. He pulled on his clothes as quietly as possible, and looked back at the sleeping man. He kissed him ever so gently on the cheek and whispered, “Goodbye.”

Then he walked away, opened the door, and left. 

**ONE YEAR LATER**

“Lance! Over here!” 

Lance grinned and loped over to the frantically waving woman. Her round glasses glinted in the sunlight as she smiled at him. He leaned down to hug her smaller frame.

“Heya Pidge,” he greeted. She elbowed him. 

“Heya yourself,” she laughed. 

“Where’s Hunk?” He asked, looking around for the chef. 

“Oh he’s running late. New chef in the kitchen so he’s a bit terrified of leaving. I finally managed to convince him not less than two minutes ago, so he should be arriving fairly soon.”

“What about Shiro?”

“He, Curtis, and Coran are waiting for us inside,” she said, jerking her thumb at the restaurant. 

“And what about... K-Keith?” He hadn’t met to stutter over his name, hadn’t meant for his voice to become just a tad bit quieter. Pidge pierced him with a look that told him she knew something was up.

“He can’t make it,” she said curtly. His heart sank. He’d been trying to get ahold of Keith ever since that night, but Keith made it abundantly clear he wanted nothing more to do with him. It stung, Keith’s rejection, and Lance was still trying to cope with Keith’s sudden radio silence. He had so many things he wanted to say, so many things he wanted Keith to hear.

“Oh,” he said. “Did he tell you why?”

“He just said he was too busy to meet up. Something about a planet in dire need of services,” she shrugged. “I asked if he needed help, but you know Keith. Likes to do everything alone.” 

“You have no idea.”

“C’mon, everyone’s waiting!” 

She all but drug him inside, where a swarm of familiar faces grinned at him. But, even though he was sitting with friends, laughing and reminiscing, he couldn’t help the hole in his chest, the hole that only seemed to grow bigger as he eyes went to the empty seat where a certain raven-haired man should have sat. 

~~

“So, you gonna spill the beans on your own or am I gonna have to drag it out of you?” 

Lance glanced over at Pidge. After the party, Pidge had invited him over to her place and they now sat in her living room, munching on nachos and drinking some beer. 

“I haven’t the faintest clue what you’re talking about,” he said, taking another sip of his drink. 

“I’m talking about the fact why we can’t get you and Keith in the same room! It’s been what, a year since you two were last seen together? What’s going on?”

“I wish I knew,” he sighed. He wanted to tell her, he did, but truth be told, he hadn’t spoken about that night to anybody. While it had been one of the greatest nights of his life, a small part of him felt guilty. His eyes had the marks of an Atlantean, a reminder of Allura, and it almost felt wrong to sleep with someone that wasn’t her. If he talked about it, it made it more real, and he wasn’t sure how to deal with all of this.

“Oh, so you’re saying this isn’t because you and Keith hooked up.”

He whipped his head towards her and she shrugged. “Wha-?”

“He told me. I don’t think he meant to, but he was drunk out of his mind. It was the night after you two did it. I got a call around 1am, the bartender was asking if I could come pick him up. It wasn’t easy, I had to call Hunk to help me carry him back to my place.”

“Why didn’t you call me?” Lance interrupted. 

“He asked me not too. Even though his words were slurring, he was practically passed out, he reached out and asked me to leave you out of it. So I did.” 

Those words stung a lot more than they should have, and he wasn’t quite sure how to react to them. So he simply waited for her to finish her story. 

“He threw up the minute we arrived. He was a wreck. I finally coaxed him into the bath and I had Hunk keep an eye on him to make sure he wouldn’t drown. I swear, it was like he turned into _you_. Anyway, he borrowed some of Matt’s clothes and I got him to drink some water. It was around 3am when he was somewhat sobered down and talking.”

“And?”

“And what?”

“What did he say?”

“Way too much. You know, we might be friends and all, but there are just some things about you that I never want to know. Like how your toes curl when he kisses the mole on your hip.”

His face went red. 

“Try being on the other side of it buster. Ewww,” she shuddered. “Anyway, I asked him why he left.”

“Isn’t it obvious?” Lance said bitterly. “It was just a one-night stand. If he wanted more, he wouldn’t have cut me out.”

“I think it was the other way around,” she said quietly. 

“What?”

“I think he cut you out, because he wanted more.”

“Whoa Pidge, back up, what are you saying?”

“Like I said, he was drunk, so he told me a lot of stuff. A lot of _private_ stuff. I don’t really think it’s my place to tell you anything more.” 

“Pidge, please. I...I’ve never been with anybody since Allura, let alone a guy, and yet, when I wake up every morning, it isn’t Allura I’m missing. It’s him. I’ve tried calling, tried getting in touch with his team, tried hunting him down myself. He’s completely ghosted me and I don’t understand why. It was...a great night, and yet, he acts like it meant nothing to him.”

“Lance… before I consider telling you anything, I want to ask you something.”

“What is it?”

“Why didn’t you ever date anybody after Allura?” 

“She was the only woman I ever loved. No one else… could take her spot at my side. These markings on my eyes are constant reminders of her. It’s almost like she’s marked me as hers, and she’s simply waiting for my life to end so we can reunite in the other world together. If she’s waiting, how could I betray her by loving someone else?” 

“Then why do you want to see Keith?” 

“To talk with him of course! To… clear everything up! To understand what’s going on between us!”

“What would you do with that information? What do you hope to gain by talking with him?”

“Well obviously it’s because…!”

Lance froze. What _did_ he want from Keith? He just made it abundantly clear that no woman would ever hold his heart like his lost princess. Allura was waiting for him, he couldn’t just turn his back and fall in love with someone else. But, Keith wasn’t just someone else. He was Keith. 

He’d been there since the start, he knew everything about everyone. He wasn’t someone Lance bumped into at a bar and hooked up with. He was his best friend and he’d slept with him. Even now, he could remember Keith’s moans, the gentle cries that spilled from his lips, how his body rocked with his, how he arched his back, how he looked at Lance with such fiery heat. When their lips met, it was as if the stars themselves had aligned, and the ache that Allura had left, vanished with Keith’s touch. 

“Lance?” Pidge asked. 

“I… I…. Gods I don’t know what to do anymore!” Lance said, burying his head in his hands.

“Lance, I think there’s one major thing here you’re forgetting.”

Lance looked up at her. She smiled sadly at him. “Allura wouldn’t want you to live the rest of your life pining after her. She’d want you to remember her, yes, but she would never ask you to live your life alone. She’d want you to find somebody to share it with, somebody to _live_ it with. Even if she is waiting, she would never hate you for loving someone else. She may have been your first love, but that doesn’t mean she has to be your last. She would hate it more if you made her your first and last, never letting yourself love again. You’re Lance for crying out loud! You’re a playboy, a flirt, a goofball, and she loved all those things about you! She would never want this for you. Always regretting, always mourning. You of all people should know that by now!” 

“I just...I…”

“And those marks aren’t a claim of ownership! She’s not warding off people by placing those on you! She’s giving you something to hold on to. She’ll always be with you, watching over you, but she’s never chaining you! If she were here, if she knew what you thought of those marks, she would take them away in an instant! Allura would never give you something that would bind you to her for all of eternity!” 

Lance had no words. Everything was all jumbled up, everything was a mess, but one thing was clear. He wanted to see Keith. Wanted it to be Keith telling him this, wanted it to be Keith at his side. 

“Do you know where he is?” He begged. Pidge bit her lip nervously. “You do!” He gasped. “Tell me! Pidge please you have to tell me!” 

“He’s so gonna kill me for this,” she muttered. She took out a notepad from her jacket pocket and the pen from behind her ear. She jotted down an address and tore out the sheet of paper. She was one of the only people that still carried around notebooks. She said she liked the aesthetic of them. 

“Before I give this to you, you have to know something.”

“What?” He asked growing just a bit impatient. 

“He’s not going to be happy to see you. He’s not going to be waiting with open arms.”

Lance snatched it out of her hand and skimmed over it. His heart stung as he realized that Keith had been here the entire time. He was only a five minute walk away. 

He pocketed it and with a grin said, “Pidge, this is Keith we’re talking about. If he welcomed me with open arms, it means we’re all going to die.”

“Hmm, I wonder about that,” she said mischievously. He looked back at her. 

“Pidge, if he ever opens his arms to me, I owe you ten bucks.”

She laughed as he yanked open the door and went on one final mission. To regain what he so foolishly took for granted. 

~~

Keith sighed as he hung up the phone. Everything was finally sorted out, and he had a week’s rest before he and the others went to their next destination. He flopped on his bed, laid on his stomach, and scrolled through the phone. He pulled a blanket over him. Ever since that fateful night, ever since he’d felt Lance’s warmth, he never seemed to feel fully warm again. He was always just a tab bit cold, and no matter what he wore, it was as if the chill would never go away.

Pictures of Pidge and the others glared up at him, and his fingers traced over Lance. His hair had grown another inch or two, and Keith reached back and touched his own. It now fell just a bit past the shoulder when he didn’t tie it up. He often wondered how Lance would look with long hair, but he couldn’t picture it. Then again, if Lance ever did grow out his hair, Keith knew it would suit him. Lance never wore a style that didn’t fit him. Hell, he wouldn’t be surprised if Lance still indulged in face masks. 

He smiled bitterly at the pictures. He was a coward, he knew he was. He’d even changed his cell after the relentless calls and texts. He knew that Lance was feeling guilty, that the only reason he was reaching out was for obligation. But, if he gave Lance enough space, Lance would get over it, and move on. Even if Keith wouldn’t. 

There was a knock on his door. “Who is it?” He called, not bothering to get up. There was no answer. Frowning, he turned his head, as if he’d suddenly be able to see the person behind the door. Shrugging it off as a prank, he turned back to his phone.

They knocked again. His jaw ticked. “I’m not interested! Go away!” He shouted. The knocking only became more persistent. Grumbling under his breath, he slid off the bed and made his way over to the door and yanked it open, ready to yell at whoever stood there. And just like that, all the breath left his lungs, and the world stood still as he peered into the dark blue eyes of Lance. 

Without a word, Lance strode past him and made himself comfortable on the floor next to the coffee table. Keith gaped, before he realized he was gawking with his door still wide open. He debated leaving, but he had nowhere to go and he left his phone on the bed. He reluctantly shut it, and padded over to where Lance was, but he didn’t sit.

“What do you want?” He asked, willing his voice cold. Lance arched a brow at him. 

“You don’t even offer water to your guests?” 

“If they were invited, I offer them coffee.”

“Oh, is that because it’s black and bitter like you?”

That insult hit home and Keith ran his fingers through his hair, putting his guard up. “What do you want Lance? I’m tired,” he sighed. 

“I want to know why you’ve been dodging me.”

“I’m busy.”

“Bullshit.”

“Unlike you, I’m not a farmer. I’m still out there, helping as many planets as I can recover, offering whatever services I can.”

“Yet, you’re still in contact with everyone else.” 

“I didn’t sleep with everyone else.”

The confession poured from his lips before he could stop it, and he cursed himself for the slip. A smirk appeared on Lance’s face and he braced himself. 

“I knew it,” Lance said. 

“Knew what?” 

“You’re in love with me, aren't you?”

Keith sputtered, trying to find a way to deny that. “We were drunk,” he reasoned. “That can’t be considered ‘love’.” 

“If you’re able to shrug it off that easily, then why keep me at arm’s length?” 

“I’ve never done anything like that before. Even I can feel awkward.”

“Gods you’re good at this, aren’t you?” Lance snarled. 

“Good at what?”

“Lying. You don’t even bat an eye.”

Keith’s heart thudded in his chest. “What do you want Lance?”

“ _I want the truth_!” Lance yelled, standing up. He walked towards Keith who took two steps back. “Why are you running from me? Why are you shutting me out?” He demanded, as he kept walking towards him. Keith kept backing up until his back hit the wall. Lance was inches away from him, and Keith averted his eyes, not willing to look him in the eyes. 

“Look at me,” Lance said softly. Keith looked over at him. “When will you stop lying to me?”

“Lance… I-” 

His words were cut off by a sudden kiss. Not sure what was happening, he didn’t let himself react. Even as Lance’s tongue flicked over his lips, searching, he didn’t move. Even as Lance pried his lips open and he tasted him for the first time in over a year, even though his heart sang and his senses jumped to life, he refused to move. 

Lance slowly began kissing his way down Keith’s neck, licking and nibbling at his weak points. His breath came in short pants. 

“Lance,” he breathed.

“I’m not going to stop until you tell the truth,” Lance said, his mouth still on his neck. His left hand rested on Keith’s hip, sending shivers through him. His right hand slowly roamed under his shirt, the rough texture as a result of his lifestyle, sending goosebumps through Keith. His left hand left his hip and slid into the waistband of his pants, cupping him where Keith craved it most. 

“Shit, Lance,” Keith panted. Lance peered up at him, but didn’t stop what he was doing. His right hand found Keith’s nipple and he gently flicked it, and Keith moaned. He should stop this, he needed to push Lance away, needed to calm down, but as he felt Lance’s breath on his neck, felt his kisses on his collarbone, felt his warm touch, he couldn’t bring himself to reject him. 

Lance brought his lips back to Keith’s and everything Keith was fighting, came undone. His hands held Lance’s face to him, as he kissed him with a passion. Lance’s hands grabbed the back of Keith’s thighs and hoisted him up, pushing him against the wall. Keith wrapped his legs around him, as they kissed. It was a harsh kiss, their tongues wrestled, fighting for dominance. Everything in Keith was alive, pulsing, and he couldn’t think as he held Lance to him once more. 

Lance carried him over to the bed, before laying him down on it. In one fluid motion, he had Keith’s shirt off, and his pants unbuttoned. He rolled his tongue over Keith’s nipple, causing ripples of pleasure to rush through Keith’s entire being. That cruel, sinful, tongue drifted lower, tasting every inch of him and Keith arched his back, his fingers curling into his comforter. Still Lance went lower, until he took Keith into his mouth. 

“Fuck!” Keith gasped. There were no words for this, and he writhed in pleasure. Lance let out a pleasing noise as he teased and suckled. He suddenly plunged two fingers inside Keith, and Keith couldn’t hold his voice in. 

“Ah!”

Lance continued to finger him, continued to pleasure him, even after Keith came. 

“Lance!” He cried, wanting so much more than this. “Please,” he begged. He couldn’t take it anymore. 

Lance’s grin was wicked, as he responded. He raised himself up, positioned his hips just right, and in one fast stroke, plunged into Keith.

“AH!”

Keith screamed at the sudden intrusion, his entire body arching and trembling. A tear slid from the corner of his eye. Lance didn’t let up, and kept thrusting at an impossible pace. 

“Shit…!” Keith panted as he tried to match Lance’s strokes. 

“Keith, Keith,” Lance rasped, his arms wrapping themselves around him. Keith slowly let go of the bedsheets and hugged Lance back. 

“I love you,” Keith and Lance said at once.

They both stared at each other as they realized what just happened. And everything, in that moment was perfect. They both started laughing as they held each other, Lance gentling his pace ever so slightly. Keith wrapped his legs around Lance as Lance hoisted them up, so that Keith was straddling him just like that first night. Keith gazed into Lance’s eyes, before he dipped his head and claimed Lance’s lips. He held him tightly to him, not ever wanting to let go.

Their tongues danced, and his heart was singing. From the way Lance held him, he could tell Lance’s was too. They could figure everything out later. Right now, this was all that mattered. For the first time this year, Keith was no longer cold. 

~~

“So what now?” Keith asked as he gazed at his hand that Lance was currently holding. They were laying in the bedsheets, with Lance acting as the bigger spoon. Their fingers were interlocked, as if both of them still wanted to joined. 

“I don’t know,” Lance admitted. “When I came here, I didn’t expect to be pushing you against the wall like that.”

“You and me both,” Keith teased. 

Lance’s response was to lightly nip him on the ear. He jumped. Lance laughed, and snuggled closer. 

“Keith, I have something very important to ask.”

Kieth slowly turned his head. “What is it?” He asked quietly.

“Can I start introducing you as my boyfriend?” 

Keith blinked. “What?” 

“Well y’know, this is the second time we’ve done the devil’s tango (Keith snickered at _that_ particular word choice), and we both just confessed our love for each other, so wouldn’t the next step be, oh I don’t know, dating?” 

Keith’s heart sped up, as hope started to spread through him. But, there was one other thing he wanted to address before he leapt into this sort of commitment. 

“Are you sure you’re ok with me?” He asked.

“What?”

“Are you sure you’re ok with me? I’m not Allura, I can’t live up to what she was, and everyone knows she was your first love. There’s something about first loves that never leave. You’re always going to love her, and that’s ok. But, are you sure you won’t start to resent me because of your love for her?”

Lance tightened his grip around Keith’s hand. “Keith, Allura was the first woman I ever loved. And you are the first man I’ve ever loved. You’re not just another love, you’re a first too. So, if you think about it, doesn’t that mean I’ll love you forever too?” 

Keith couldn’t help himself. He unlocked hands, rolled over, and kissed Lance once more. Lance cradled the back of his bed as he pushed him against the mattress once more. Keith held out his arms and Lance’s eyes widened. 

“Well, damn, there goes ten bucks.”

“What?”

“Never you mind,” Lance chuckled. “It was a ten bucks well spent.” 

~~~

**Three Years Later**

“Oh my god! Look at you!” Pidge gushed as she hugged Lance. “Put you in a tux, and you look like a half-decent groom!” 

“Only half?” He asked, indignant. 

“You’re still Lance, and being Lance, I can’t make you look better than half in my mind,” she teased. He rolled his eyes and allowed her to fidget with his bow tie. 

“So, it’s really happening, huh? Are you excited?” She asked.

“Yeah, I am,” he murmured. 

“You’re gonna be a good husband Lance.”

“It’s just a step up from being a boyfriend really,” he teased. It was her turn to roll her eyes, before lightly slapping him on the arm. 

“It just sounds more official,” they both said at the same time, before they burst out laughing. 

“Lance! There you are!”

Hunk entered along with Shiro and Curtis. 

“Hey guys,” Lance greeted. Shiro smiled at him.

“Nervous?”

“Nope!” He grinned. 

“How does it feel being a pilot again?” Hunk asked. “You ever miss farming?”

“Not as much as I missed piloting. And this time it’s even better than piloting the lions. This time, I’m flying with Keith,” he smiled wistfully. 

“Oooh, someone’s getting all sappy,” Pidge teased. He blushed but didn’t deny it. Shiro clapped him on the back.

“You and Keith are gonna have a wild time together aren’t you? What were we ever thinking, letting you two go out on your own, flying around the galaxy again?” 

Lance laughed and the doors opened once more. His laughter died instantly as Keith entered the room. His hair was pulled back into a graceful ponytail, and his suit fitted him to a T. He wore the colors of the blue lion, whereas Lance wore the colors of the black lion. Keith smiled gently at him, and Lance held out his hand. 

Keith walked over to him, and firmly clasped it with his own.

“Marriage huh? Never thought I’d ever get to see this day,” Keith murmured just loud enough for Lance to hear.

“I know right? I’m marrying my best friend, we’re going to have nothing but adventures. Who knew that life could turn out this good?” He winked. Keith leaned up on his tiptoes to plant a quick kiss to Lance’s cheek. 

“Who knew indeed?” He murmured.

“Alright, you two lovebirds ready to do this?” Pidge asked. They looked at each other and nodded. She opened the door, and together, hand in hand, they walked through, ready to start a brand new life together. 

Sometimes, first loves are the only loves one can experience in a lifetime. 


End file.
